2023 Holiday Gift Guide: Dude-Approved Gifts for Dad

A ceiling fan, plus an LED light, that installs in seconds by screwing into your existing ceiling light socket?! Damn, Socket Fanlight, talk about a real cool, light bulb moment!

The Socket Fanlight wraps a 15.75" ceiling fan around a 1,000-lumen LED light bulb, so you can enjoy some airflow with your illumination without the DIY knowhow and hassle that might otherwise accompany this type of upgrade. Installing the Socket Fanlight is as easy as, say it with me...pie.

This holiday season, like every holiday season, it's knives out! Some of them will even be the literal kinds of knives you use to carve turkeys, slice open packages, and give as gifts to the men (or pocket-knife-collection' ladies) in your family. The Work Sharp Rolling Knife Sharpener is for those knives. The compact and dynamic tool has 4 different sharpening angles, and includes 3 sharpening abrasives that will hone the blades of chef's knives, kitchen knives, scissors, pocket knives, and folding knives back to a razor-sharp edge.

I often find myself at a loss for words, or unable to find the word I'm looking for, so maybe this Little Book of Lost Words can help me out too. By "too," I mean, in addition to all of you dudes and ladies out there looking for a gift for Dad, who is going to go into full-on, 10/10 Dad-geek-out mode learning about Collywobbles, Snollygosters, and 86 Other Surprisingly Useful Terms Worth Resurrecting.

In The Little Book of Lost Words, author Joe Gillard digs up some dead yet delightful words from the past that describe issues, people, and ideas that are still pertinent today. For example, a "grimalkin" is: "A cat." Pertinent today! A "snollygoster" is: "A dishonest, corrupt, and unprincipled person, esp. a politician." So pertinent today! And - this one's for the Boomers! - a "dewdropper" is: "An unemployed young adult who sleeps through the day."

CIVIVI's Precision Tweezers request entry into your first aid and survival kits with the promise of a surgeon's accuracy, a ballerina's finesse, a strongman's durability, Hugh Jackman's versatility, and Mick Jagger's performance longevity.

The tweezers are CNC-machined from a single piece of stainless steel billet to give them additional strength, and make them more hardwearing and robust. Their tip, which CIVIVI calls "uniquely fine," goes from 2mm open to closed completely with each squeeze. It is able to perform delicate first aid and safety tasks, such as splinter, glass, and metal shaving removal, as well as pick up and manipulate tiny pieces used in arts & crafts and watch / eyeglass repairs.

I'm pretty sure READYACTION's Tablet Chest Harness is intended for people who do a lot of work standing and moving about. Contractors and real estate agents, utility and warehouse workers, event organizers, coaches, all the on-the-go on the job types. But when I look at the Tablet Chest Harness, I see someone else. I see Dad.

Dad waiting for his bus, his Uber, his flight to board. Dad "watching" the kids' soccer game while the real soccer game's on. Dad stirring constantly for 8 minutes like the recipe says. Dad sitting comfortably on the couch, but needing the pointer fingers on both hands free to type out his email.

Slide your feet into the Super Mario Bros. Piranha Plant Slippers, and enjoy plush comfort, 80s gaming nostalgia, and some serious pop culture drip. And the cost? Only...your life.

No big deal, though, you have, like, 37 more, right? What? No? Only the one?!

OK, dudes and ladies, pro tip: do not put on a pair of Super Mario Bros. Piranha Plant Slippers while you're still on World 1-1 of Super Mario Bros.

Adult wet wipes are kind of like bidets: the people who use them looove them, but they never get much air time in conversations. Even conversations about the bathroom. Even conversations about the bathroom that might involve detailed descriptions of what your morning deuce looked like that day.

And this Toilet Paper Holder with Wet Wipe Dispenser is the perfect way to make sure we continue not talking about how many people adore cleaning their keisters with pre-moistened, lightly-scented napkins reminiscent of the ones their mamas used to wipe their asses as babies.

With Grill Pinz you can Bacon! Wrap! Everything! Neatly, with ease, and without panic that a piece of precious pork fat will unfurl or fall through your grill grates during flipping or removal.

Grill Pinz are 1.25" long barbed pokers capped with a coin-like disc. Their makers say the Grill Pinz design is superior to that of toothpicks or typical BBQ skewers because they don't pierce meat significantly enough to let its tasty juices escape during cooking, but still secure bacon strips in place, thanks to their tiny barbs.

It's like fairy dust for foodies. Kosmos Q Wing Dust comes in almost a dozen different flavors, and while you may think its name deems it no more than a seasoning for chicken wings, I think that's more of a reference to the wings of the aforementioned fairies that flutter about in the land of Kosmos Q to make it. Yes, you can sprinkle this toothsome dust over your chicken wings post-frying, but you can also toss it into your popcorn post-popping. Or vegetables post-roasting. Or eggs post-scrambling. Pulled pork, taco meat, cole slaw, and meatless Mondays when your wife makes you eat heartbreakingly bland tofu are all canvases ready to be dusted with some Kosmos Q too.

HOTO's Cordless Power Washer is powerful enough to increase water pressure 2.0 MPa (about 290PSI) on its self-suction setting, and output 300L of water per hour. And the body weighs just 3.3 pounds, so it's easy to use one-handed in any of the power washer's 5 modes, all accessible simply by turning the nozzle head. No separate attachments are needed, even for Foam Mode - an incorporated 250mL translucent PET soap bottle handles that transition.

The Cordless Power Washer has a detachable battery back fitted with 5 x reinforced 2500mAh lithium battery cells. Fully charged, it will provide up to 45 minutes of continued use.

I'll level with you: I'm not much for perfection when it comes to DIY tasks. Especially those that involve building, repairing, or hanging something. So I wouldn't add an expandable multi-angle level that can measure around corners and across various planes with a single placement, and even hold itself in place on certain surfaces thanks to built-in magnets. I'd be digging my own grave doing that, dudes. Indicating to my wife, She-Ra: Princess of Power, and my mama that when they want some cabinets installed, or 97 frames hung, or their frickin' closets redesigned, they can just ask me to do it instead of paying someone.

But perhaps you are that someone who gets paid to do such things. Or you're just a lot nicer to the ladies in your life than I am. And in that case, might I recommend an expandable multi-angle level that can measure around corners and across various planes with a single placement, and even hold itself in place on certain surfaces thanks to built-in magnets.

The UPAN will slot up and straighten out your sausages. Wield your wieners. Barricade your brats. Cradle your corndogs. It will even manhandle your meatballs and turn out your toad-in-the-holes. The UPAN is a channeled cast iron sausage pan designed to prevent meat tubes from bending during cooking, and ensure they cook evenly all the way through.

The UPAN's single-piece casting build is intended for a lifetime of use on any type of heat source, including stovetops, ovens, grills, and open flames. In addition to sausages, you can use it to cook meatballs and bacon, as well as pour in some batter to make yourself a classic English toad-in-the-hole.

I don't know if feng shui or Marie Kondo would like the looks of a Cobra Storage Garage Door Rack, but dudes. What a way to maximize space in your garage. Cobra Storage originally developed their Cobra Racks to secure and organize fishing rods, but as you can see, the holders are game to elevate and eliminate the clutter of brooms and mops, long-handled gardening tools, pool skimmers, and hockey sticks too.

Cobra Storage Racks come in 18" or 21" pairs, the former made to fit most 5-panel garage doors, and the latter for most 4-panel doors.

I've often wondered how parents carry kids on their shoulders without the kids jerking backwards or toppling sideways and falling off. And what the MiniMeis G4 Shoulder Carrier indicates to me is: sometimes the kids do jerk backwards or topple sideways and fall off.

But they won't if they're secured in the waist harness and leg straps of a MiniMeis G4 Shoulder Carrier.