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0Teva Men's ReEmber Mid Moccasin

Teva Men's ReEmber Mid Moccasin

$89.95 Amazon »

RemEmber Teva's Ember Moc slipper-style indoor / outdoor shoes? Well, Teva decided to ReEmber the Moc this season, and has even added some variety, and a few inches to the line in the ReEmber Mid Moccasin. These men's...

Lampjoy Glass Rings

$16.20 - $30.70 Etsy »

My wife, She-Ra: Princess of Power, would break a Lampjoy Glass Ring within 5 minutes of putting it on. No offense, sugar britches, but you are the be-all, end-all of hand talkers, and at least one of those enthusiastic...

Poler Reversible Napsacks

$130 Poler »

Oh, Poler Reversible Napsacks, you knew you had me at trippy colors and patterns of Rainier Beer. These camping and lounging companions certainly aren't the first wearable sleeping bags or blankets to take a seat at the...

Box of Crap Packing Tape

While "box of crap" is an accurate description for at least 3/4 of the packages I send and receive, I feel like sealing them with Box of Crap Packing Tape wouldn't bode well for me. Package thieves will think it's a trick...

Modern House Beds for Kids

$123.35 - $704 Etsy »

BUSYWOOD gives kids beds of their own and homes of their own all in one with this series of beds in modern-style house designs. And I have to admit, I'm jealous. The handmade alder wood frames are unique and standout...

Takumi No Waza Green Bell Nail Clippers

$15.40 Amazon »

I'm gonna start the New Year right, with a resolution to Takumi No Waza Green Bell Nail Clip my nails when they get too long or split, instead of biting the shit out of them...

Boot Bananas Shoe Deodorizers

$20 Amazon »

The stench of well-worn, oft-sweated-in shoes is frikkin' bananas, yet the smell itself is nothing like actual bananas. And for that matter, Boot Bananas don't smell like bananas either, they're just banana-looking deodorizers...

Woo More Play Sensual Massage Oil Candle

$36.75 Amazon »

I'm not really sure why Woo More Play's sensual massage oil candle is named "Eat Me Out for Once." As far as I can tell, the muscle-rubbin' lube the melting wax of the candle produces is scented with sandalwood, papyrus...

Unigear Ski Boot Bag

$75.99 Amazon »

Skiing is so fun! Except for the traffic getting to the slopes, the parking in the resort's lot, the schlepping of your gear to the chair lift, and the waiting in line for a gondola once you get there. But once you get...

Crotchless Yoga Pants

Who's up for a little downward dog...gy style? These Crotchless Yoga Pants from Cherry ChiChi proudly describe themselves as "yoga pants for sex." Just in case there was any confusion, or a moment's thought that they...

SUBU Indoor/Outdoor Slippers

$60 Amazon »

Yeah. SUBU Indoor / Outdoor Slippers are indoor / outdoor slippers until the first time you wear them outdoors on the snowy, wet, muddy, dead-leaf-and-grass-strewn surfaces of winter. Then they become, exclusively, SUBU...

Japanese Linen Slippers

$23.11 Etsy »

"Japanese Linen Slippers" could mean anything from square-toed sandals with a thong strap to shoes shaped like squished-flat cats and covered in fish scales and Shiba Inu fur. These particular Japanese Linen Slippers...

Face Mask Extender & Ear Saver Straps

$12.99 Amazon »

I bought a set of these Face Mask Extender & Ear Saver Straps at the end of August, and my wife, She-Ra: Princess of Power, and I have probably worn them for over 24 cumulative hours each since then. I don't use them...

Diesel Sound of the Brave Cologne

$43 - $88 Amazon »

Sound of the Brave Cologne, Diesel? Seems to this dude the name should be Smell of the Brave. An eau de toilette made especially for:...

Kodiak Belt - Field Belt with Knife Sharpener Buckle

$69.99 Argali »

The Kodiak Belt has a knife sharpener buckle for instant blade-honing in the field. That's great news for backcountry hunters and campers, especially those willing to double up on belts, with a Kodiak on top and a Burls...

F*ck 2021 New Year's Eve Tiara

$3.50 - $7 Etsy »

Yep, that about sums it up. And if you're like, "No. I want to ring in 2022 with a hard F*ck 2021. No asterisks, no censorship, nothing cute about it," well, you're in luck. Lantz and Lady, makers of the F*ck 2021 New...

Hot Chocolate Design Pegasus Pumps

$104.99 Amazon »

Hot Chocolate Design names their winged, golden Mary Jane-style pumps "Pegasus," and, ladies, I can certainly see the appeal of going to your New Year's Eve party dressed as a mythical horse. But Pegasus doesn't have...

Viper Ring

$129 Amazon »

Welp, it's better than having a viper around your neck. This Viper Ring turns the Mangshan pit viper into a beautiful, formidable piece of jewelry. Its head sits atop your finger, while its body, er, snakes around either...

ABUSA Lambswool Insoles

$12.99 - $14.99 Amazon »

These ABUSA Lambswool Insoles for shoes, boots, and slippers provide no arch support, but Baaaaaa! Who needs arch support this winter when your feet are luxuriating in thick and cozy natural fleece?...

Dripstick After-Sex Cleanup Sponge

$2 - $95 Awkward Essentials »

Welp, I'll give Dripstick credit for one thing: it puts on no heirs when it calls itself a "cum sponge." Yeesh. That description makes the Sperm Towel seem downright prude...

The Tinkle Belle - Device for Ladies to Stand & Pee

$27.50 Amazon »

It appears the Tinkle Belle, a urination device ladies can use to stand (and stay fully clothed!) and pee, was developed for hiking and camping, maybe porta-potty use at festivals and sporting events. But I say, if you...

Norse Tradesman Hair & Beard Coils

$14.87 Amazon »

My fellow vikings and ancient Scandinavians at heart, what better way to show your old Norse appreciation than by be-baubling your beards, braids, and dreadlocks with these coiled hair and beard rings from Norse Tradesman?...

Strong Man Ring Holder

$19.95 Amazon »

Sure, this Strong Man Ring Holder is super ripped and all, but I bet the dude's a total acne-ridden, cross-eyed, butter face. Ugly as sin, and that's why they never show him from the front in any of the ring holder's...

Nostalgia with a Twist of Darkness T-Shirts

$14 - $20 Steven Rhodes »

This line of Nostalgia with a Twist of Darkness T-Shirts comes from the dark and nostalgic mind of artist Steven Rhodes. I've included some of my favorites in the images above, but there are dozens more to choose from...