Mass Effect Clothing
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- Mass Effect 3 Leather Jacket - $189.00
- Mass Effect N7 Hoodie - $89.99
- Dark Horse Deluxe Mass Effect: Normandy SR-2 Cerberus Ship Replica - $28.17
- Mass Effect N7 Backpack - $39.99
- Mass Effect Bi-Fold Wallet - $19.95
I know many of you are thinking it, so I'm just gonna put it on paper: the mass effect of Black Milk's Mass Effect body-hugging clothing collection is to effectively give every male fan of the video game series a massive boner. Black Milk, we Commander Shepards salute you. Up high and down low.
Dudes perusing our Girlfriend Gift Guide will note that many items suggested for your better half also double as gifts for your best half: yourself. The Mass Effect line, which includes leggings, a tank dress, and a swimsuit, will certainly serve the purpose of making even the most homely/whiny/naggy/empty-headed women more pleasant to look at and interact with, and if your girlfriend is actually hot and tolerable already, a pair of N7 leggings becoming one with her ass could elevate her to prototype status for Super Sentient Female 1.0.
Mass Effect leggings are available for standard online purchase through Black Milk clothing, and the tank dress and swimsuit will be made to order.
Anatomical Leggings
Been scouring the racks for pants that display your ass as the true anatomical masterpiece it is? Black Milk Clothing's skin-tight anatomical leggings won't just enhance the curves of your posterior, they'll show off...
Flayed Flesh Garters
Take peek-a-boo garters to the next level: peek-a-boo blood vessels and layers of muscle tissue, courtesy of open-wound prostheses and stocking accoutrements from Etsy's Meaghan O'Keefe. A pair of unpainted latex prostheses...
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Shocked Trump Swimsuit
Ever thought the beach was missing a bit of... politics? Well, fear no more! The Donald Trump Swimsuit is here to fill that void. Imagine this: a one-piece swimsuit emblazoned with the larger-than-life, zoomed-in face...
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Sharkini Swimsuit
Sharks are scary. Girls are scary. Gaaahhh! It's the worst hybrid ever! To all Dude Facebook readers who expressed sentiments of peeved off at our posting of a Sharkini photo without information about where to throw wads...
The Batman Collection
Black Milk Clothing's Batman Collection has a Batsuit for every type of crime a girl could want to fight. For example, not looking hot. Or not showing enough leg. Not showing enough cleavage. Not wearing a belted Bat-Signal...
Middle Earth Map Leggings
Control Middle-earth--and likely all male Elves, Wizards, Orcs, Dragons, Dwarves, Ents, and Hobbits--for under $100. You don't even have to enter into battle or acquire Rings of Power. Leave it to Black Milk Clothing...
Skirt Length Sluttiness Stockings
While these may not be the definitive measurement for exactly how a lady is feeling, they're certainly guaranteed to provoke some interesting conversation. From "demure" to "dangerous" the Leg's Talk stockings provide...
The Game of Thrones Collection
The start of Season 4 may still be a few weeks away, but Black Milk's Game of Thrones clothing collection drops in mere hours. Houses Stark, Lannister, Targaryen, and Baratheon represent in an array of nakedness shields...
Spandex Black Cat Burglar Costume
What's better than an inked Felicia Hardy prancing around, getting limber on your pages of The Amazing Spider-Man as the Black Cat? A real live girl (or boy--we aim to please all orientations) prancing around, getting...
Tron Cycling Skinsuit
One thing I learned recently is that cyclists call their little outfits "kits". Isn't that precious? So here is a Tron kit for all of the bicycling Tron fans out there, as well as the far larger number of normal, non-bicycling...
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Finfolk Custom Mermaid Tails
By what magnitude would the awesomeness of mud wrestling increase if all the ladies participating got to wear a Finfolk Productions 100% dragonskin and platinum cure silicone mermaid tail? Muddy, slippery, rolling on...
Tetris Leggings
And you thought her legs couldn't get any more hypnotizing. Wearing a pair of Tetris leggings basically means slinking around in a second skin of polyester, retro-chic Nintendo graphics, and errant flecks of drool from...