Full Metal Jacket Jeep
- Hardwire White Bulletproof Backpack Insert - $99.00
- Hardwire Bulletproof Clipboard - $109.00
- Wolo Model 419 Bad Boy Air Horn Kit - $35.14
- Smittybilt Clinometer with Compass - $16.99
- GoPro Camera Roll Bar Mount - $17.79
100 hours to build this beast. Totally worth it. Their words, not mine. Not that I'm calling BS or anything. It's just that I'll never know if Starwood Motors' Full Metal Jacket Jeep is totally worth it or not because my mama is too cheap to buy me anything more expensive than a monthly bus pass and an adult-sized big wheel. However, if the Full Metal Jacket's specs are to be believed, and the video of it launching over a sand dune to be trusted, I'd say even at over $100 grand, this is one Jeep that could earn its self-assigned title of Worth It.
Starwood Motors mechanics are conversion grandmasters. The 2013 Full Metal Jacket is their latest Jeep Wrangler transformation, an accomplishment they say requires 100 hours and 80 pounds of sweat to complete, and which emerges with a bulletproof suspension, off-road dominance, and a presence demanding of submission when its fat 40" Nitto Mud Grappler tires roll down the boulevard. It may even be able to carry its own reality show. I know I'd rather watch GoPro footage from the FMJ's rollbar than another second of Bruce Jenner's face slowly melting into an exact replica of The Scream, anyway.
An upgrade from their 2011 Jeep conversion, Starwood has fitted its 2013 Full Metal Jacket with a Pentastar 3.6-liter V6, which advances the vehicle's horsepower output from 202 to 285, and torque by about 10%. Acceleration is 0 to 60 in 8.4 seconds, a 3-second improvement over the previous model. Additional mechanical and component badassery include:
- Smittybilt SRC Stinger front & rear bumpers
- Smittybilt XRC body armor for front fenders, rear corner guards, and rock guards
- Kevlar liner on body
- Warn-Zeon 10,000-pound winch with 94' of Kevlar/nylon braided rope
- 22" off-road XD Bomb wheels
- Curry G2 Rock Jock Dana 60 rear and front high pinion big nearing axle assembly
- Air locker differentials with on-board compressor
- Rubicon Express long arm suspension system
- Procar seats with black leather & Alcantara Daytona-style inserts
- Kevlar-lined floor
- Kenwood touchscreen nav/DVD player
- Front & back cameras
- Underseat lock box
- (2) 1lb dry chemical fire extinguishers
Full Metal Jacket making you feel all tingly? Perpetuate the stimulation with an entire gallery of Dude's Gifts for the Garage.
AdrenaSuit - Bulletproof & Superpowered
The fit is hitting the shan. The adrenaline dam has busted, and your fight-or-flight response is sprinting at a world-record-setting pace. What does it look like? Are you stepping up? Freezing up? Freaking out? Peacing...
eleMMent Palazzo Land Yacht
DeLoreans set the standard and all, but if I had to travel to and from the future today, I'd want to hit the space-time continuum in equal parts comfort, class, and automatic liftable flybridge lounge that self-converts...
/et-of-the-most-expensive-43731.jpg?mode=crop "11 of the Most Expensive Things for Sale on Amazon")
11 of the Most Expensive Things for Sale on Amazon
I tried to curate my collection of 11 of the most expensive things for sale on Amazon not just according to their cost, but also their substance, how well they present, whether or not I looked at their price, read their...
Knight XV Fully Armored SUV
Conquest purports to marry "ultra-luxurious" with "fully-armored" in its forthcoming handcrafted SUV, the Knight XV. Historically, this type of marriage has not ended well (see: the reigns of Louis XVI and Marie Antoinette;...
Diamond Armor - $3.2 Million Bulletproof Suit
At $3.2 million, Swiss fashion house SuitArt's Diamond Armor has nabbed the title of Most Expensive Suit in the World. The current title. I will obliterate it next month when I debut my Diamond & Adamantium Armor for...
Bulletproof Polo Shirt
If the acute fear of being assassinated on the golf course has kept you from swinging your 9-iron too many times to count, welcome to the start of the rest of your life. Breezy, bulletproof, and cleared for the country...
ICON Thriftmaster Truck
Sometimes I like vintage. Well, vintage aesthetics. Not really vintage functionality. Or the thought of being in my strapping manly prime when now-vintage things were in theirs. Typewriters. Cool to look at. Not cool...
/bulletproof-mens-underwear-38126.jpg?mode=crop "Bulletproof Men's Underwear")
Bulletproof Men's Underwear
So what exactly does the Like New qualifier on these bulletproof men's underwear mean? The exact words in Sportsman's Guide's listing are British Military Surplus Blast Shorts With Kevlar, Like New. Are they saying, "Yeah...
Jeep Adventure Tires
If you thought nothing could beat off-roading on the weekends, imagine this: off-roading on-road during your weekly commutes and leisurely drives around the 'burbs. Jeep Germany's new Adventure Tires, on sale starting...
/jammock-jeep-or-truck-hammock-19223.jpg?mode=crop "Jammock Jeep or Truck Hammock")
Jammock Jeep or Truck Hammock
I feel like the Jammock came to be one night after a few hours of fishing and a few dozen beers. Too drunk to drive back to the city, a couple of friends starting digging around their truck bed for sleeping bags and second...
/bowchair-luxury-sex-chairs-34223.jpg?mode=crop "Bowchair Luxury Sex Chairs (NSFW)")
Bowchair Luxury Sex Chairs (NSFW)
You like bouncy, bouncy? Bowchairs, luxury sex chairs in handsome and discreet designs, have bouncy, bouncy covered from head to toe. With, yes, lots of boobie in between...
/black-swan-superyacht-23052.jpg?mode=crop "Black Swan Superyacht")
Black Swan Superyacht
In a way it sucks that the Black Swan Superyacht is just a concept right now because that means its technologically-advanced, supremely-luxurious, ninja-shark-looking self doesn't really exist. But in way it's good too...