Treadmill Rock Wall
I feel like the Treadwall--a rock wall on a treadmill-style conveyor belt--might be the ultimate example of something that appears to be really easy, but in practice makes 80% of its users look like complete assholes. Kind of like the mechanical bull. Or smart girls in short skirts. But at least the bouldering belt rotates by body weight alone, meaning that it will automatically match climbers' movements, instead of heaving them to the ground after 12.7 seconds. Or one vodka tonic. The motorless Treadwall also has an adjustable axis for advanced scramblers to increase the difficulty of angles and holds.
Treadwalls are available as both freestanding and wall-mounted units, each measuring 6' x 11'. Components include a freestanding or wall-mounting frame, counter, mat, holds, side covers, textured surfacing, and photo electric sensors.
Bas Rutten O2 Trainer
Who wants to wheeze like a fat asthmatic chasing down the ice cream man? I do! I do! Temporarily anyway. MMA master and onetime UFC Heavyweight Champion Bas Rutten developed his O2 Trainer to build strength in a part...
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Steelhose 5-in-1 Flexible Free Weights
The name "Steelhose" is literal. These 5-in-1 flexible free weights from FitFighter are lengths of real fire hose filled with steel shot. Use them regularly in your exercise routine - or join FitFighter's fitness app...
SexFit Sexual Fitness Tracker (NSFW)
Bondara, a British sex toy online store and blog, plans to begin testing of its SexFit prototype in the 4th quarter of 2014. So by 2016...or maybe even February 2015 since I'm sure they'll have thousands and thousands...
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17 Restorative Gifts for Health & Wellness Enthusiasts
These 17 restorative gifts are for the health and wellness enthusiasts on your list who juice, blend, cup, condition, detox, soak, plunge, and ommmmm their way through life. The ones who always suggest you try meditation...
Water Walker Underwater Treadmill
You know those dreams you have where you're trying to run towards or away from something, but you just...can't...make...your feet...move? It's like running through quicksand, or setting concrete, or...on an underwater...
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Penis Weight Set
All the talk of building a prison body during quarantine made me seek out this penis weight set. Because while you can certainly do pushups, pullups, chinups, dips, and squats like a convicted felon, it's gonna be real...
SISU War Hammer
SISU! is the Finnish word for stubborn determination, and an appropriate moniker for a 28-pound War Hammer that has a predominantly fitness-based application, but could also wallop the ever loving Fuck You out of the...
Primal Bells
On the list of things that would really suck: 1) Finding your head on the receiving end of a 72-pound kettlebell with an incensed gorilla face carved into it; 2) Finding your head on the receiving end of a 500-pound incensed...
High Altitude Training Mask
The high altitudes of Nepal, Machu Picchu, and Denver may naturally administer pulmonary resistance that conditions human lungs, and improves athletic endurance, but who wants to spend the time and money to travel there?...
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STRYK RXT-1 Robotic Striking Coach
Your dreams of being bitch slapped by a robot? Meet RXT-1. He makes dreams come true. A forthcoming "robotic striking coach" from STRYK USA, the RXT-1 mounts to your wall and uses 4 removable padded arms to spar with...
Short Sleeve Weighted Training Shirt
Here's a way to make yourself way less comfortable, but way more badass while working out. The TITIN Force is a complete weighted compression system all tucked into a short sleeve shirt. It utilizes a 3-part hyper gravity...
King of the Ring Fitness Arcade Game
Nexersys calls their King of the Ring arcade game a "virtual fighting ring" but one look at all those full-contact pads and the surrounding cage and I am 95% sure that I would sustain non-virtual injuries while using...