JHO Knives Le Finger Spike
Pick your nose with Le Finger, and then pick your teeth with the steel spike hidden inside it. ... Yes, you're right. That spike looks a little too thick to be an EDC toothpick. But also a little too slim for shotgunning a beer. A little too pointy to be a marlin spike. Not made of wood or silver, so vampire slaying is out. Hmmmm [strokes chin with Le Finger]. Whatever could you use it for then?
JHO Knives leaves that decision up to you. Like the brand's sexy BLITZ Tool and scary AF (thats "as fish) F**H Spiked Club, Le Finger comes with le scant information on its design background and purpose. What I do know is it's a sculpture of a human finger cast in brass, and finished in your choice of tumbled shiny, matte aged, or black. If I had one I'd probably give it to my mama for Mother's Day so she could use the spike to aerate her lawn and the finger to point at the neighborhood kids to get off it.
Pocket-Sized Grappling Hook
One more Bat Toy for my Bat Toy Box! This pocket-sized tube that adeptly screws into a grappling hook was originally produced by EDO Robotics in response to a desert warfare operator's request for a lightweight, reusable...
Meindl Retractable Spike Boots
They're like Wolverine claws for the bottom of your feet. These Meindl retractable spike boots stick it to ice and snow with their patented, perfect traction Tec Vision spike system. When wearers flip out the boots' heel...
Slipknot Masks
This Halloween, dress like you grew up in Iowa. The many men of Slipknot have many faces, most of them incredibly disturbing and fitting for a night of scaring the ever-loving sweet Jesus out of kiddos and seniors and...
Caltrops Tashibishi Spiked Stoppers
Now this doesn't look like a very nice thing to do to someone. But I guess if s/he cheats, steals your wo/man, gets you fired, or breaks your favorite Star Wars collectible, one method of revenge is to Caltrops Tashibishi...
/jho-knives-fh-spiked-club-32363.jpg?mode=crop "JHO Knives F**H Spiked Club")
JHO Knives F**H Spiked Club
My sense is that JHO Knives' F**H spiked club could do as much physical damage to my wallet as its $1,250 price tag would do figurative damage. 100% pure cowhide leather? Psshhh. If the brass spikes encircling the club's...
/lawn-aerator-shoes-59574.jpg?mode=crop "Lawn Aerator Shoes")
Lawn Aerator Shoes
My mama says she's going to get me a pair of Lawn Aerator Shoes, because when I start stomping around her house all teed off she's asking me to do even more yard work, I may as well be improving the health of her lawn...
/malicious-bar-stool-53145.jpg?mode=crop "Malicious Bar Stool")
Malicious Bar Stool
If you think the Malicious Bar Stool is, er, malicious, check out what designer Merve Kahraman based her design on: ancient times' "Chair of Nails Torture," seating dotted with impalement-ready spikes, and used by inquisitors...
Stegosaurus Vest
OK, maybe this spiked pastel vest will make the lovely vixen who wears it look more like an ankylosaurus than a stegosaurus, but considering I had never heard the word "ankylosaurus" before in my life until I Googled...
/backstabber-occasional-chair-30906.jpg?mode=crop "Backstabber Occasional Chair")
Backstabber Occasional Chair
Backstabbers of the world, Haunt fantasy furniture made a Valentine's Day gift just for you! To those would would like to give a Backstabber Chair to their most deserving ex (lover, friend, family member - take your pick)...
/collapsible-middle-finger-62196.jpg?mode=crop "Collapsible Middle Finger")
Collapsible Middle Finger
The wind up F you is one you'll always have, er, on hand and all, but this Collapsible Middle Finger accessory will make an even bolder statement when used to pepper your gestures and enhance your communication skills...
Fidget Rings
Maybe you fidget because you're anxious. Because you're bored. Because you have ADHD. Because you're 5 minutes away from walking into the biggest interview of your life. Because you just drank 11 cups of coffee. Now fidgeters...
/finger-toe-ice-packs-62203.jpg?mode=crop "Finger & Toe Ice Packs")
Finger & Toe Ice Packs
These Finger & Toe Ice Packs from Penguin Fingers (kudos to whomever came up with that fine name!) could be a bonanza of a find to the jammed, sprained, and swollen digits and piggies of you dudes and ladies, but this...