Deluxe Dutch Oven Kit
Nothing says, I love you to the fiercest farters in your life like a Deluxe Dutch Oven Kit. Hahaha, you might think, this is such a clever gag gift! Everyone's gonna have a good laugh at The Dude when he opens it, and we'll go around sharing stories of how we have all been blasted by his flatulence.
But the joke will be on you, gift-giver, when The Dude actually uses the Deluxe Dutch Oven Kit's Fart Blanket to cook up some real gourmet treats to ghost you with.
And by "ghost" I mean: 1) Casually let loose without sound or spectacle in the otherwise unoccupied room you're in, as if the stank bomb were released by a ghost; and 2) Open the lid to his dutch oven by pulling the Fart Blanket down over your head, thereby making you look like a costumed (and gagging) ghost. Boo! and Boo-ya!
Shreddies Fart-Filtering Underwear
Leave it to the Brits to class up farts and poots. And also to create a solution that spares those who didn't just drop a silent stink bomb from inhaling the fumes released by the one who did. Shreddies is a line of men's...
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Build Your Own Burp & Fart Machine
Whoever said learning can't be fun clearly hasn't seen the E-Blox Building Blocks STEM Circuit Kit - a wild ride into the world of sounds that are guaranteed to raise an eyebrow (or plug a nose). Get ready to dive into...
Subtle Butt Disposable Gas Neutralizers
At printing, Subtle Butt Disposable Gas Neutralizers had 14 reviews on Amazon, and every single one of them contained both a serious critical analysis of the product's smell-quelling efficacy, and an insightful comment...
/windi-the-gaspasser-gas-22052.jpg "Windi the Gaspasser Gas & Colic Reliever")
Windi the Gaspasser Gas & Colic Reliever
Windi the Gaspasser is one of those WTF products I as a childless dude saw and immediately thought was, in this order: a funny joke; a disgusting not-joke; a sad reality. You basically stick this little (un)plug in your...
Odafree - Fecal & Gas Odor Pills
Odafree is an over-the-counter supplement ingested to combat odors associated with the excretion of feces and flatulence. Without the euphemisms? It's a daily pill that claims to remove the stench of hot death from shit...
/the-fartvac-suck-up-farts-47618.jpg?mode=crop "The FartVac - Suck Up Smelly Farts Before They Escape")
The FartVac - Suck Up Smelly Farts Before They Escape
As excited as I know you all are to stick the FartVac up your butt in the name of sucking up smelly farts before they escape into the room, and noses of your family / date / coworkers / fellow citizens waiting at the...
/swimming-poo-a-video-game-58901.jpg?mode=crop "Swimming Poo - A Video Game Full of Crap")
Swimming Poo - A Video Game Full of Crap
Swimming Poo's STEAM blurb describes it as "a humorous action game," but that's about as full of crap as Swimming Poo itself. Humorous? If your favorite jokes start with "Pull my finger," or "So I was taking a dump the...
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Rose-Scented Fart Pills
One time me and my friend Cornelius were having a philosophical discussion about farts. It went something like this: would you rather continue to anonymously fart farts that smell like something crawled up your butt and...
/special-ingredients-31051.jpg?mode=crop "Special Ingredients Shitzlinger Action Pack")
Special Ingredients Shitzlinger Action Pack
I'm not sure whether Shomer-Tec's Special Ingredients line of products are more prank or more spy. Maybe they fall somewhere in between. In case you're not familiar with these products, they come in vials filled with...
AIRE Digestive Tracker & Fart Predictor
You probably think FoodMarble's AIRE is redundant. You know exactly what your digestive tract turns into a room-clearing onslaught of the fartsies. Beans. Beer. Looking at a bag of Taco Bell. But do you know why these...
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Liquid Ass
Finally. After years of research and millions of dollars in funding, we've found a way to capture that amazing ass smell in the form of a liquid to spray all over our enemies unsuspecting friends before they leave for...
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Personalized Fart-Thwarting Candles
A personalized fart-thwarting candle. I know one household who needs this burning good scent blanket for the vile and death-dealing ones. Mine...