Wampa Ice Scraper Mitt
/wampa-ice-scraper-mitt-top-4885.jpg "Wampa Ice Scraper Mitt - Top View")
- Wampa Fleece Hat - $19.99
- Wampa Plush with Detachable Arm - $29.99
- Normal Looking Ice Scraper Mitt - $7.71
- LEGO Star Wars Hoth Wampa Set - $53.98
- Auto Emergency Snow Shovel - $11.99
Who better to scrape the 8 inches of snow and half-inch screen of mother f'in ice off your windshield this winter than the abominable snowman himself? Or at least his severed limb. Slide on the Wampa Ice Scraper Mitt, and watch the layers upon layers of celestial poo the sky dumped on your car glide off. Without acquiring a soaking wet shirtsleeve and mild case of frostbite. I'm hoping the Wampa's menacing claws will also maybe wean my partially senile neighbor's Westie off his routine of humping my leg 'til kingdom come as I try to leave for work and they head home from his morning walk.
Note that vendor ThinkGeek makes a comment about using the Wampa scraper and then drinking Hoth Cocoa. I point this out because it is clever and I think word of its existence should spread and I am taking the high road here and not trying to pass the punnerific gem off as my own. Though probably I could have thought of it if I were writing this while watching Star Wars. Or drinking hot cocoa.
Wampa Mitt components are two-part. 1) A standard ice scraper enveloped in a 2) warm, cozy, 100% polyester mitten.
Star Wars Adult Onesies
Star Wars onesies for adults are what's called being comfortably chic on Halloween, and F'ing awesome the other 364 days of the year. Boba Fett, R2-D2, a stormtrooper, and the grandaddy of being the worst daddy of all...
/The-Darth-Knight-1019.jpg?mode=crop "The Darth Knight")
The Darth Knight
You love Batman, but you're a loyal Star Wars fanboy. Halloween is coming up and you have a difficult decision to make. Can you betray Darth Vader for your new crush on the Dark Knight? Good news. You won't have to. Mash...
Star Wars Pipes
One good way to bring the Dark Side and the Light Side together is to get them all stoned. What, we're fighting? I'm trying to eradicate you from the galaxy? OK, well...why don't we order some deep dish pizzas...and a...
/stormtrooper-whiskey-decanter-24357.jpg "Stormtrooper Whiskey Decanter & Shot Glass")
Stormtrooper Whiskey Decanter & Shot Glass
A stormtrooper who's packing nothing but Jameson and a Buttery Nipple is my kind of stormtrooper. I bet in whiskey decanter and suspended glass forms they're even a decent shot. At least until round 7 or 8 when your own...
/star-wars-face-masks-43963.jpg?mode=crop "Star Wars Face Masks")
Star Wars Face Masks
May the 4th be with you, and may the Rona be in a galaxy far, far away. This series of Star Wars face masks is from Ethical Addiction, made in honor of favorite franchise characters - from Chewbacca to Vader, Yoda (adult-size)...
/rebel-bass-guitar-17209.jpg "Rebel Bass Guitar")
Rebel Bass Guitar
No longer must you search the galaxy to find this Rebel Bass, but you will have to wait at least 3 months to get it. Last Fall, after photos of his custom Star Wars guitars had gone viral online, Englishman Doni opened...
The Force Awakens First Order Stormtrooper Helmet
The good news is this is the first ever Standard Line version of a Star Wars: The Force Awakens First Order Stormtrooper Helmet, and you can have one for $200 ($249.95 if you wait until October 1 to order). That bad news...
/galaxy-grill-tie-fighter-bbq-48648.jpg?mode=crop "Galaxy Grill - TIE Fighter BBQ")
Galaxy Grill - TIE Fighter BBQ
Ladies and gentlemen of the Empire, when your swarm of TIE Fighters fails to help you become masters of the galaxy, grab some charcoal and a pair of tongs, and allow them to help you become masters of the Galaxy Grill...
/Han-Solo-Carbonite-Chocolate-Bar-1361.jpg?mode=crop "Han Solo Carbonite Chocolate Bar")
Han Solo Carbonite Chocolate Bar
What took them so long? Although I'd prefer an Augustus Gloop drowning in chocolate bar, Han Solo's plight lends itself nicely to aiding in the fattening of America as well. Jabba The Hutt, although posing no long term...
/darth-vader-meditation-chamber-47693.jpg?mode=crop "Darth Vader Meditation Chamber Desk Set")
Darth Vader Meditation Chamber Desk Set
Darth Vader: Meditator. The Force meets the OM in this Darth Vader Meditation Chamber Desk Set, a Regal Robot design brainstormed and built custom for a client's studio, and based on the Dark Lord's meditation chamber...
/star-wars-on-earth-prints-14438.jpg?mode=crop "Star Wars on Earth Prints")
Star Wars on Earth Prints
Stirring scenes from American history, meet stirring scenes from American sci-fi. This set of 4 Star Wars prints from Thirteenth Floor pits some of the Empire's worst villains against some of our own greatest war heroes...
/lightsaber-willy-warmer-32623.jpg?mode=crop "Lightsaber Willy Warmer")
Lightsaber Willy Warmer
This Lightsaber Willy Warmer might be the finest expression of Grandmas's yarn I ever saw. Not a bad tribute to Star Wars either, presuming you've mastered The Force well enough to wield this saber once it's fired up...